radd boy turns 1

i can hardly fathom that our little man is ONE! in true paige fashion, we partied hard. i decided on a little lumber jack/camping theme and just as they always do.. things got a little out of hand? ha ha. look, turning one is BIG deal around here.... and maybe it's my way of distracting myself from the tears of my baby turning one. and i also love to party.

but it's all about celebrating this special boy whom we absolutely love and adore!

birthday invites from minted.

(count on me to not notice the marshmellow in the picture until waaaay after the fact. SMH)

sweet tooth fairy made these darling s'more cupcakes for me

the s'more station..

what good is a campout without matches, ya?

i alllllllways get emotional singing happy birthday to my kids.

so bitter-sweet, this growing-up stuff, right?

but especially on first birthday's. and this one was no exception.

radd was shocked at the flame. and shocked that he was getting a cupcake.

he kept looking at me like, "are you saying this is okay?"

how each of my kids have eaten their first cake has been such a reflection of their personalities.

rowan + radd were very careful. only taking a pinch of frosting at a time.

and greer took the cake by both sides and dug her face right in.

so stinking funny.

he was super happy about the whole thing and didn't want to stop.

we are smitten by you radd-boy. 

happy first birthday mister, the world is yours!

{and then she was five.. }

my little rowan is five! how can this be? i'm in total denial. last year around her birthday, we had just found out i was pregnant (surprise to us!), and we were two weeks away from moving into our new house, so i took it easy and said we were going to have an "off" year with the birthday's. (and much to my surprise, i stuck with it!) so we went to chuck-e-cheese and called it good. well, i don't know, this year i wasn't really feeling it either. life is just crazy right now. but truly, rowan begged me to have an ariel birthday with a piñata this year, and at the last minute, i couldn't refuse anymore. so a few days before, we sent out invites. and then i made the mistake of getting on pinterest. oops.

me, go overboard on my kids birthday? no way. but rowan went out to lunch with her daddy for her birthday and as soon as she walked in and saw all of it she said "MOM! i LOVE all my decorations!!" and then asked if i could leave them up until she turned six. so, that made it all worth it. i love her so much.

i got her cute invite from this darling shop on etsy.

i bought lots of paper streamers and twisted them up the wall to make them look like seaweed, and then cut out a ton of sea creatures and taped them throughout. i also blew up a bunch of clear balloons that were different sizes and hung them up on fishing wire so that they looked like they were bubbles. they were my favorite! i hung an octopus from the ceiling, and a couple jellyfish as well. it really felt like we were UNDER THE SEA! (wink).

it really was such a fun little party for all of rowan's little friends. and then the party continued all weekend celebrating with our families!

happy birthday rowan paige. you are the light of our lives!

{ to my rowan }

my sweetest, sweetest, sweetest, rowan girl...

today is your fifth birthday! say whaaaaa? i cannnnot even believe you are five. it just flew by so fast! was it really just five years ago that you made me a mom for the first time and i was holding your tiny little self in my arms up in logan? insane! but also, at the same time, i cannot believe you're only five. you are beyond wise for your age. 

i seem to get emotional on birthdays, but i tend to get a little extra emotional on your birthdays. alot of it is because you're my first of everything. it seems like i am chasing time and i just can't catch up! you're getting so big, so fast. i could bottle you up and savor every ittty bitty piece of you.

but the biggest part of me getting emotional is because you are so so so special to me! someday's i just dont know how i get through the day without your help. life has been a little bit crazy for all of us since baby radd came and you have been the biggest help to me, to dad, to greer, and to baby brother. sometimes i feel like you could run the family and we'd all be just fine ;). you have been very aware of my emotions, which has made me feel guilty at times, but you get so concerned and it absolutely melts my heart. you have said things like "are you crying because it's just so hard to have three kids now?" just saying things that no 4 year old should even comprehend! 

there have been plenty of times where greer has been crying or brother is crying and before i can even get to them, you were there helping them without being asked. i have ended up in tears so many times over that. one time i heard you get up with greer in the middle of the night and the next morning i asked you why you did that, and you said "i wanted to help her because i knew you and daddy were so tired." i mean, seriously child. (que the tears).

you sometimes cry at shows. 

you are pretty dang shy still.

sometimes you call greer "sweetheart" and its hilarious, and so sweet.

you absolutely love to dance. even if it's to a commercial.

you love to color or paint.

you are very logical and want most everything explained until you completely understand. sometimes you'll say "mom, i'm confused by that." such a smarty-pants.

you still have the most incredible memory, it blows my mind!

your teachers at school and primary love you because you're the best listener. 

after your birthday party tonight, i just wanted to talk to you and tell you how special you were to me and daddy, and i could barely get a word out. i know Heavenly Father loves me, because he sent you to our family. i literally feel blessed beyond measure to be your mom, rowan. i don't know if i'll ever be able to make you understand the love your daddy and i have for you... and what an incredibly special little girl you are! i pray everyday that you keep those redeeming qualities that make you the most precious little five year old in the whole world. never ever change!

happy birthday to you, my amazing girl.

love you beyond belief! 

love mom.